Dimsum and more

Gimme more***

The word Dimsum means “to touch the heart” and they certainly touch mine. There is something delicate and yet very wholesome about a dumpling. The outer pastry needs to be crafted with much finesse. Knowing that someone’s skillfully nimble fingers crafted my food, makes eating that much more pleasurable. A pleasure that can never be found in canned beans or a packet of chips. My stomach seems to smile every time I eat dumplings.

Now coming to the restaurant: with a name that announced it’s intentions of touching my heart I was compelled to visit. Spoiled for choice I ordered Lamb momos and chicken pao to begin, and my love affair with this place began ever since. Besides just dimsum, the place does offer a fair selection of main course gravy dishes and rice/noodles. But what you must try are they plain steamed or garlic buns which can be eaten with any of the Chinese gravy dishes. I haven’t seen or tasted this sort of a bread anywhere else. I did not know the Chinese eat bread and gravy, but authenticity is hardly an issue when something tastes so good.

Since we’re on the subject of hearts being touched, nothing does it like a sweet ending: close your eyes and imagine this steamed dumplings stuffed with honey and coconut. They don’t just touch my heart, they grope and fondle it,  taking me to a place where the clouds are shaped like dumplings and it rains honey.

Snapping back to reality, a comfortable meal form 2 should cost between 500 to 700 rs. ( Located on JP road, Versova )  ph : 02226373057

TGIF

Hippies use the side door ***

For the most part I like my meals to be light enough for me to do cartwheels an hour post. However there are always those few days in a month when I crave indulgence. In such cases, I channel Garfield, wear clothes that won’t reveal a spilling gut and head out to TGIF. (go ahead, judge me)

Now let me state here that I am not a fan of the American consumerist way of excessive eating. So I was reluctant to eat at this very evidently all American restaurant. But when I sunk my teeth and wrapped my lips around their spicy-tangy-perfectly seasoned chicken wings for the very first time, I was sold. They make some finger lickin’ good fried sesame chicken strips, with an absolutely decadent sweet dipping sauce. (I think it’s time for those lose sweat pants again)

Needless to say I have been to TGIF a couple of more times after the first visit, and have almost never been disappointed. I would warn you against eating their Italian fare. But that’s common logic. I would never order a Pizza at Shiv Sagar, so also, when at TGIF eat only dishes you think an obese American would.  Although, for a place that is “all American ” one would expect better spare ribs.

The place is slightly over priced. But, they have great lunch specials. A 2 course meal for Rs. 299 and a 3 course meal for Rs.399. Though the options are not as wide as when you order à la carte, whatever they do offer is very well made and absolutely worth it. Otherwise a meal should cost about Rs.500-800 a head.

Goa Bhavan

Sol Kadi for the Goan Soul *****

Now you must know this about Goans, no matter where in the world a Goan goes, fish-curry-rice for lunch is a must. This meal must be followed by a siesta. I advocate this lifestyle and strongly believes it leads to a happier disposition and a more relaxed state of mind. Move over Deepak Chopra, us Goans have the path to a positive, happy, stress-free life figured out.

So, when Goan government officials need to come to Mumbai on work, they face a dilemma. “Will I get my fish curry rice ?” Goa Bhavan solves this dilemma. It is the canteen in the Goa government guest house, where on any odd day you can hear loud Konkani and the sizzle of fish being fried. Always eat their thali, the meal consists of rice, fish curry, salad, a vegetable and fried fish. If you have a doubt about what fish to eat, just ask the kaka (uncle) there what’s fresh. The fish is always perfectly cooked and the curry is so good that you’ll be drinking it by the bowl. For those who don’t like fish, (what are you doing here?) they serve a great chicken thali as well, made with free range chicken, not the usual broiler. The chicken is worth a try, although personally I would never pass off the fish to eat chicken.

And lastly, a warning, post this lunch if you head back to work you will sleep at your desk and drool on your paper work. The food will make you submit to sweet slumber, as all lunches should.

Location : Next to Fab India, Gulmohor Road, Juhu

Damages : about rs150 / head

Deeba’s Food Point

Like a loud loving auntiji ****

Deeba’s food point is like a college mess, run by a hormonal yet loving fat Lukhnowi auntyji. This ‘restaurant’ is along the footpath of J.P Road, Versova and can be recognized by a easily lost flex banner that bears it’s name. Don’t bother reading the menu, because what is available on the day entirely depends on the owner’s wife who cooks all morning and sends food in aluminum tiffins to the joint. What she cooks is then heated up and presented to customers. It is best to have a chicken thali (rs.75) which consists of rice, dal, chicken, rotis and vegetable. The portions are enough to feed a big punjabi man, so always go on an empty stomach. The food is great and you’ll be left licking your fingers. The Mutton Biryani is light and flavourful, although for spice lovers it might be a bit bland. Even if you over order and stuff yourself like a woman pregnant with triplets, you will still spend under Rs.150/head. Another plus is that they have a little ice-cream cart. So a spicy meal can be followed by some mango-dolly. Now, what more could one ask for ?

But beware, when I said hormonal I really meant it. Some days the place is just shut for no rhyme or reason, perhaps the auntyji had an argument with her neighbor or decided she needed to give one of her truant children a beating. Perhaps she went to get henna put in her hair. Whatever the reason, there will be no forewarning or note of the door. You’ll just find the place empty. In which case you’ll have to settle for Subway across the street, which will never satisfy a palate that came craving for some mutton nihari.

Location : Opp Subway, JP Road, Versova  ( The deliver and take large by-the-kilo orders)

Ph : 9819023889

Global Fusion

Just Once ! ***

Firstly, let me start with a mention of the entirely misleading name. There is nothing ‘global’ about this place or the food it serves. It is an Asian food restaurant that serves Chinese inspired appetizers, Japanese inspired sushi and Thai/Chinese inspired main course. It’s one of those confusing places, that you like at the first visit and them kind of begin to rethink.

The first time I went I was sold. I paid a fixed price. I had all this great looking food presented to me. I was given an empty plate and told “eat all you want”. Tempting ? Of course. I enjoyed the sushi and ate more dimsum than I could count. I moved on to their huge selection of desert: cookies, icecreams, pastries etc. I went home full and satiated, almost certain I would come back again.

And I did, but on every repeat visit, I began to notice the flaws. The menu almost never changes. It’s been 2 and a half years, and everything on the menu is the same. A lot of the meats are not well cooked, especially lamb / mutton dishes. Many of their sushi items have canned tuna, and one has chicken and mayo. Now I’m sure the Japs would frown upon that. I must also mention, that the place is favourite for Kitty-parties and Reunions, so beware of loud noisy groups of cackling aunties. You are almost certain to have a bunch at a table near you.

The buffet is worth it only on a weekday afternoon, when it’s at it’s cheapest. It increases for dinner, weekend dinner’s being the most expensive at about 1,000rs per head. It’s worth a one time visit at Rs.650. Go with time on hand and some entertaining company, because the food alone isn’t going to keep you interested.

Urban Tadka

Dhinchak Desi ***

I’m not a fan of the loud decor, noisy ambiance, closely packed tables, and ridiculous colorful bhangra jackets the waiters wear. But after one GannaSingh ( white rum + sugar cane juice ), I’d wear the damn shiny jackets myself and dance to ‘Oye lucky, lucky oye’.

Whenever I come here, I am lured into eating like a well fed Punjabi dame who has worked whole day in the field milking cows and beating truant children, and must now relax and indulge in some hearty hogging and gluttonous glugging

I begin with some sort of Kababs, I have eaten almost all, none have disspointed. My favourite starter being Lemon Chicken. I never miss the paya soup, which is thick and spicy. I almost invariably move on to Makke ki roti and Sarso ka Saag, with indulgent quantities of hand churned makhan. They make a hearty Maa ki Daal and Murg Kaali Miri. I invariably top this all off with Jalebi-Rabdi, which I shameless do not share with anyone, and eat till I cant move. After I’m done I need to burp a few times to help myself stand.

Following this absolute ludicrous abuse of my humble digestive system, I move on to pleasant slumber, and wake up weighed down by the guilt of indulgence and the always condemned bulge in my belly . And yet I go again ….. and again….. and again.

Damages: Without drink should be 3-4hundred per head.

Far East

That Illusive Duck ***

It isn’t often that I find myself in the suburb of Powai. The intention was to go to Out of the Blue, a branch of the old bandra favorite. However, a sudden craving for Asian food meant that our party of 4 had to find an alternative, and we did, in the same mall complex as the afore mentioned. Far east is a oddly designed restaurant that looks like a place frequented by boring business men in ill-fitting suits. I almost walked out when I happened to notice  Beijing duck on the menu.A slave to the fond memories of delicious duck I had eaten in Beijing; I had to walk in.

Much to my disappointment, they did not have duck that day. Reason, no one orders it so they don’t stock it.  How heartless to have seduced me with the promise of duck, only to present other meats that would only pale in comparison to the undoubted King of the feathered kind. I grudgingly went through the menu and our choices were made.

We had Pork stuffed buns and Pork&veg dumplings to start. They were very authentic tasting and took me back to backpacking in China. Then we moved onto steamed rice with Massaman curry, which was mild yet flavorful. We followed this by a pork tenderloin dish called Bulkogi with fried rice; sweet & savory, perfectly balanced. There was a long list of delicious sounding deserts, but nothing worth a mention. The most interesting sounding ones, were again out of stock.

All in all, we had a flavorful pleasant meal and were served by a charming young waiter.
This restaurant is good, but won’t compel me to drive this Far east for a meal.

Damages : 2000rs for 2 starters, 2 curry dishes & rice, Chinese tea & 2 deserts. ( 4 people)

Cafe Universal

We go to eat, not to seat *

I’d heard much praise for this alleged gem of south Bombay, so I ventured to Cafe Universal on a not-so-ordinary day. It was my birthday and I was almost certain I’d have a good meal at this joint. But my lunch was so tragically bad, that I had to go out for dinner the same day to restore my faith in good food.

The ‘grilled’ chicken looked like it had been deep fried in my month’s quota of oil. The gravy that accompanied it looked like the creation of an angry chef in a dirty college mess. The fries actually dripped oil when they slimily made their way onto my fork. The steak that a friend ordered was burnt black and had enough onion rings thrown on top to feed the entire Brady bunch.  And whadd’ya know, the steak and chicken tasted the same.

So the place is cute, has lovely tables and old Irani artifacts that give it much visual character. But let’s face it, we came to eat.

Avoid this place, and if you must eat at a similar place within the same price range, try Churchill on Colaba Causway. Will be worth the cab ride from Universal.

Sammy Sosa

Mucho Gusto *****

(Cut to a hot humid summer night in Mexico) A wounded damsel walked into Sammy Sosa’s, esta uma dia caliente. Her finger was bleeding, as it had been savagely cut by an unasuming cactus. My lover could do nothing to stop the bleeding, and then arriba ! arriba ! , I was resqued by a young chico who from out of nowhere recognized by plight and offered me a humble band-aid.

Never before in Mumbai have I come across such a polite and considerate staff. When I entered with a small nip on my finger I was offered a band aid immediately, without having to ask for help. Gracias senor !

Once my tragic injuries were taken care of, we proceeded to spice things up with lamb quesedillas and a huge chicken salad. This we followed by ‘TexiMexi’, a lamb gravy with herbed rice. The meat was melt-in-the-mouth tender, and the the spicy rice complemented the gravy perfectly. The portions are very generous. We felt like a hearty Mexican couple eating a hearty meal after a day at the farm.

On following visits, I fell in love with their Tower of Aubergine and I never miss the Grandma’s Lasagna with minced lamb. It’s like love in a bowl. Besides, I’ve never visited a restaurant in Bombay with such an excellent selection of beers. You’ll find something for your every mood and fancy.

Damages : A meal for two with beer should work out to around Rs.1500

Mosate

A Mild Flirtation ***

On one Saturday evening, I ventured out on a date expecting crowds and ques.  But much to our delight we were greeted by a solitary sullen Frangipani tree. The overall color pallate of the place is extremely mellow, beiges n browns, entirely soothing. But an observation of closer details lead to the discovery of some garrish chandeliers and fake-gem-studded wall flowers. Anyway I vowed not to judge and looked away. The menu arrived and was surprisingly shabby for an otherwise nice looking place. Yet again, I let is pass and chose to be lazily laid back like the frangipani tree.

We decided to keep the meal light and easy, as all lovers must do in such coy escapades. We started with a miso soup with tofu and sea weed. Delightfully subtle and silken. (Rs. 110). We moved on to Minced chiken and bird Chilly dimsum. The pastry outdid the filling, but made a mushy mouthful. (Rs.250 for 8 peices). Lastly steamed rice (Rs.100) with Balanese style Soya chicken and cononut cream. (Rs. 250) sadly, undersalted and lacking zing, yet comfortingly creamy.

Overall I had a very soothing meal, nothin excited my palate. The food just mildly flirted with me, I wasn’t seduced into passionate submission. Luckily I went with a lover, so he made up for the lack of zing.